It is possible to do a prostate massage on yourself (or by your partner). In this blog post I’d like to share the most important information and techniques for being able to do so.
First and foremost: Do NOT massage your prostate when you have ACUTE BACTERIAL Prostatitis. Stimulation of the prostate gland when inflamed with bacteria, will only increase the symptoms and might cause severe inflammation. Also when you are diagnosed with prostate cancer, first check with your urologist if prostate massage is a good idea or not. In some cases (cancer stage I and II) it might be a beneficial addition, in other cases (cancer stage III and IV) it might increase risk of spreading cancer cells.
That being said, prostate massage can be very beneficial for many men. Weather you are super healthy and sexual active, or weather you are slightly impotent or suffer from an enlarged prostate or chronic prostatitis, causing you to get up at night to urinate, your health will benefit from regular prostate massage.
There are two basic ways to DIY prostate massage; with fingers or with a prostate massage device. I will explain the technique with fingers, but you can replace the fingers with a prostate massage device. There are plenty of these devices on the market, designed both for the health benefits of a prostate massage, and the sexual stimulation that a prostate massage can supply.
DIY method with fingers
step 1 Try to have a bowel movement. If you don’t have to go, that’s OK too, you just want to have an empty bowel for this.
step 2 Relaxation. Take a couple of deep breaths, maybe even take a hot shower to relax your muscles. It makes it easier and more beneficial, the more relaxed you are.
step 3 equipment; good quality latex glove (any pharmacy will have them) and good lube (KY Jelly is what the doctors usually use, or natural caster oil is a good alternative). Shortcut fingernails. tissues, towel.
step 4 BE GENTLE. Being gentle is the keyword here! Your prostate gland is one of the most sensitive spots of your body, and easily bruised. And the anal membranes are sensitive and easily damaged.
step 5 Either lay down on one side or get on all fours (find out which position works best for you), or when in the shower, lift one leg up on the toilet or on a chair.
step 6 Press into your perineum with your thumb. First slowly, but gently as deep as possible to activate the trigger-points in this area. Do this a couple of times. When you are feeling that the area is getting more relaxed,
step 7 Lubricate your index finger (or two fingers; the index and middle finger). Press against the anus so it starts to relax. After a while slowly increase the pressure, but always allowing the muscles to relax as your finger starts to enter. Your finger should be pointing forward towards your navel.
(This will make your wrist be in an uncomfortable position, but you’ll get used to this. Find out which position give you the best access to your prostate, you will quickly recognize this after a couple of DIY massages. For some people it just might not work, due to short fingers, high placed prostate, or wrist inflexibility. For those I recommend using a prostate massager device or finding a prostate massage therapist.)
step 8 While entering the anus, your finger should almost ‘be sucked in’ till about 4 to 5 cm inside, rather than you needing to push or poke it. when the muscles are relaxed, you should not even feel much resistance or discomfort in this phase. When it is about 4 to 5 cm in, relax and breath deeply while your body adjusts. Don’t overlook the importance of being relaxed in this state, because you will benefit most from the massage while relaxed. Also, if it feels uncomfortable or it gives a burning sensation, use more lube.
step 9 Then slowly start moving your finger(s) in a ‘come here’ motion, towards your navel. You will feel your prostate, the structure feels different from the rest in that area. It is about the size of a walnut (or bigger if you have an Enlarged prostate).
Don’t poke, don’t press too hard, gently ‘stroke’ the prostate gland from side to side. Being gentle is the key, especially if you have a prostate condition. Too much pressure or the wrong angle (poking) can injure the delicate membranes. The idea is to stimulate the prostate gland so that the blood flow increases and to push out stagnant fluids. Better slow and gentle and a bit longer, than short and vigorous.
step 10 After 5 or 10 (or 15) minutes you are done. It might happen that some fluid will come out of the tip of the penis while doing the massage (a few drops). It is not the aim of this massage, so it does not matter if the fluids come out or not. It is still very beneficial as it increases the blood flow and moves the stagnant fluids.
(It is also possible, when you have a very healthy prostate, that you excrete quite a lot of prostatic fluid without an orgasm. This is very OK and healthy, that’s why it is called prostate milking (and not only beneficial when you have prostate issues, but also when you just want to stay healthy).)
step 11 Try to urinate. After the massage with your first urinating flow, the acid fluids will come out (which might give a slight burning sensation).
step 12 Repeat. It is recommended to do prostate massage 2 to 3 times a week, to maintain a healthy happy prostate!
When you are diagnosed with a prostate condition, you might want to try a ‘therapy approach’, with a daily massage with taking supplements for a healthy prostate in addition. You can find out about supplements in another blog post.